Catching up ...

Wow - I can't believe it's been so long since I've written. It's been a crazy couple of weeks, but then it always is crazy. We've had a lot of weekend trips lately, which makes things even crazier because there's more to do during the week.
It's been a good couple of weeks. We celebrated our first anniversary as husband and wife. We had a great time - we went back to Asheville, NC where we got married. It was nice to relive the moment and remember what's important in life.
We've had our battles the last couple of weeks too. My husband is starting to work from the house more. It's nice because he's home a little more during the week. The downside is he's turned our living room into his office and yours truly flipped her lid a few days ago when I couldn't even find a place to sit on the couch for all the paperwork! I ranted for 2 hours (off and on!). So the next day I came home to find a rather large new desk in our 3rd floor guestroom. I'll tell you a secret ... I HATE the desk. It doesn't go with the room and it's way to big. But - you pick your battles. I don't have to sleep in the room and I'm just so darned glad to be getting him out of the living room when he's home.
My husband is on a week long hike this week. That's something I've had a hard time with in the past. It's hard to accept that they deserve their time to themselves, even after spending so much time at work. He called today and I can hear in his voice that this week is what he needed. He's out on the trail, no ones around to call him, no email, no demands. And he's facing a physical challenge. I've found that supporting him when he does these things does us both good. He's happier when he's home, and honestly, I am so busy this week with work, it's nice to have peace when I get home.
Anyway - I feel like I've just rambled on this time, but that's what's on my mind right now. I'll start writing again more regularly. It was nice to hear from a few of you who have posted recently!

When it rains it pours!

Literally. We had such a nice relaxing day yesterday but this morning we had a rude awakening. We woke up to find water in our basement. It's the first time it's been a problem, but it is raining like crazy here so I guess the ground is just overloaded. It was a very stressful day to say the least. Up until now my husband and I have lived in condos so we've always had someone to call when something is wrong - now we're on our own.
We quickly learned just how important a shopvac can be and we've vaccuumed about 100 gallons out of the basement so far. But the rest is all me - my husband had to fly out tonight for a very important meeting he couldn't miss. He made sure I had what I needed - but tonight in between commercials during Desperate Housewives - I'll be vacuuming water out of the basement - by myself. That is one of the things that SUCKS about being a weekend wife!

By the way, SMP inquired about my friend with twins. She's doing great. She just made it to 32 weeks. Full term is 36 for someone with twins so things are looking great. Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers. I'll be sure to post pics of the twins when they're born.

Frustration

I have always prided myself on NOT bringing my work home. Not just paperwork, etc. - I've never brought my left over frustrations home with me. I've always been able to leave them at work and chalk it up to corporate's problem, not mine. That has been difficult to maintain in the past couple of weeks. I've been anxious about returning to work on a Monday. I am always irritated about something - and so many things have been going wrong that are out of my control that I'm always looking around for "what's next?".

I resent this change and hope it is temporary. My office is undergoing some technology changes so there's a reason for the issues. But I'm realizing any time a business, or a person for that matter, undergoes major changes, those changes also serve to spotlight what issues have always been there. And so often, we ride out the changes, and then go back to our normal routine, without addressing the problems that are there - new system or not. If a system is disorganized, they'll still be disorganized long after the changes. If a husband and wife fight about chores in the old house, they'll most certainly fight about them in the new one (unless of course a maid is included :) ).

Anyway, no real point to my rantings - they're just general observations about human nature. Hope everyone is having an easier week that I have! Feeling frustrated too? - if you've been able to answer your phone, print from your computer and protect very important documents from being erased by the IT guys - then you're having a better week than me!

What do you need?

Hey Ladies -
As I'm developing the concept of A Weekend Wives Club, I'm basing my direction on what I need as a "weekend wife." But I'm wondering, what do you need? Many of you have been so great to write and express relief at not being alone in your situation. But what do you need from this blog? Are there issues you'd specifically like to see addressed? In a perfect world, I'd have this set up like other chat sites with forums and profiles, etc. But I'm not a web guru, so this is what I have for now.

I'm asking because it seems like traffic has been slow on the blog recently, and I'm wondering if there's something you're missing. My goal for the blog was really to encourage many to write in their thoughts and feelings about things. I think that's the best way to advance our "cause" as weekend wives and create a network in which we help eachother. Reading my blogging on about my life only has to get old eventually, and I'd much rather include your thoughts and experiences.

Anyway - that's what's on my mind tonight - trying to get this thing moving and shaking - and I can't do it without you!

Killing Them With Kindness ...

I'm trying to turn over a new leaf. Instead of bitching and nagging my husband about things I wish he'd do, things he hasn't done, etc. I have been sweet as sugar lately. It wasn't easy in the beginning. The little things that were bugging me were trying to hard to bubble to the surface ... but I bit my tongue.

The end result - my husband is now doing the things I was nagging him to do. I'm getting more of what I want by not telling him what I want. Believe me, I've nagged enough he knows the things that bug me ... the things I need him to take care of. So I'm not even saying them anymore and he's finally doing them.

We've talked about it, and he said he was so tired and annoyed with me constantly telling him what he was doing wrong, it made him not want to do a thing. Now that I'm the new "easygoing wife" - he's been awesome (for the most part).

I have no idea if this would work with all men. Some of them might just be relieved the nagging stopped and keep ignoring the piles of laundry and garbage. But it's working for mine - and I'll take it! I'm hoping this isn't a "honeymoon" phase and is the real deal. I'm also hoping I can continue to bite my tongue. My problem is, I want things done when I think they should be done. When it's not on my timeline, I get irritated. I'm working hard not to be such a control freak.

God Bless You with Children

For the past week our two godchildren have been visiting us with their parents. I love them both dearly and they are both very well behaved ... BUT even with that, it is so challenging to have children in the house.

This is not a surprise to me. I knew children would be a lot of work, but the reality of someone needing you 24/7 really wears you out. I'm sure those of you with children are chuckling at this ... this is a fact you have long known. But for someone like me who is used to only taking care of herself during the week ... it's a shock to the system.

Even with this - I can't wait 'til we have children. But I realize this week how hard it will be with my husband on the road. There is no one around to give you a break. There's no one to say, "here - I'll give them a bath tonight."

My question is ... HOW DO YOU DO IT???? Please help us poor souls who are either approaching motherhood or who just found it! I can't imagine how you squeeze everything into a day and maintain your sanity!

Busy Busy Busy

My apologies for my extended absense. I have been absorbed in house work over the last couple of weeks. We're trying to get our house ready for company and it's been non-stop painting and other not so fun things.

But we're almost done, at least as done as I intend to be for a while. I'm tired of scraping paint from my nails and stepping over drop clothes.

Anyway - in other news. I've had some discouraging news lately about the publishing of my book. For those of you who don't know - I'm trying to publish a book called The Weekend Wives Club. My thought is that we all have very specific needs as weekend wives and many of the relationship books out there don't address them.

So for the last six months I've been submitting my proposal to publishers. Most of them really like the idea, but they don't believe there's a market for it. I'm really not sure where to go now. I believe in the idea and it's so encouraging to hear from you guys when you find this blog .... but I'm running out of options. I still have a few proposals out there for magazine articles, and the idea of self publishing isn't out of the question .... But I really thought this idea would take off quickly. Publishing this book has become a dream of mine and now it's frustrating to see it stalling a bit.

Anyway - maybe something will come through soon. Now that we're finishing this house work up, I'll have more time to work on things.

Hope you guys have a great weekend!